USA > Washington > Whitman County > Pullman > Chinook, 1899 > Part 7
Note: The text from this book was generated using artificial intelligence so there may be some errors. The full pages can be found on Archive.org (link on the Part 1 page).
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8
Ten grave and reverend Seniors, sitting in a stately line. One they classified as Junior, and that left only nine Still nine little Seniors, had not one arrived too late; He failed to pass all exams, and that left only eight. Eight little Seniors started for graduation heaven. One blew out a little lamp Alas ! There are but seven. Seven little Seniors - one with flying shafts did mix,
And went whirling round and round and now there are but six. Six brave little Seniors to mid-year exams. arrived; And here they found -you know the rest -and now they numbered five Five little Seniors, the thesis world did explore Here one gave up in sheer despair, and that left only four. Four spry little Seniors, working hard as hard could be -
How could those cruel quizzes do it ? They left just barely three. Three heroic little Seniors braved graduation through. One of their heads did swell and burst, and now they numbered two. One fighting little Alumnus got him a little gun Started away for Manila and left the other one. One little Alumnus, on matrimony had begun, And here he found, and very soon, that he his race had run.
131
THE LAST OF THE OLD SCHOOL OF BED
LEG MANIPULATORS.
We had had "fine cut," rice, and prunes for supper and after we had watched the last fascinator disappear through the front door, and the heart-sick bunch grassers had breathed up the sigh, "How sweet the thought, we'll meet again," a general dry sham- poo was indulged in, to bring the mind and stomach more in har- mony and pass the time away until seven o'clock would compel each one to betake himself to his little den of toil and no one but Brodie and the well beloved inspectors could stalk abroad. Stiff collars and blouses were then consigned to their rest while sweaters and winter garments were invited to assist in the evening's study. The lights soon ceased to light and after the usual "lights o-u-t" had been sung to the same old oft repeated tune, little two-candle power kerosene lamps were generally set going to keep some keen-edged mischief from cutting the tender thread of thought. Once in a while a stray bit of steam that had slipped by the close fitting valves at the power house, would come hopping into a radiator and send a little refrigerated air whizzing through the stop cock into the room. But all this was required to keep things in their usual or- der. Some of the boys had already retired when those more thought- ful of the morrow were allowed to sing out "Lights 0-0-0-1," just before time for the wink. Now all the good boys (including everything but Y. M. C. A. and S. C. L.) retired. Soon Jones be- came anxious about his door lock, imparted his fears to Hyde and went to see about it, but somehow in the dark he unlocked it in- stead of locking it, and perhaps only those included in the parenthe- ses above can ever explain the reason. A bed leg on "fifth" had become somnambulistic and in its wanderings had thrown itself
132
upon the stairway and descended with shrieks and groans such as only a bed leg going down stairs can give rise to-enough to strike terror into any Proctor's soul. Soon after this, two shadows could have been seen hovering over Jones' bed, and after one or two mys- tic signs, Hyde suddenly became heavy and Jones light, but after Hyde's increased weight had thrown Jones four feet into the air, it suddenly lost its effect and Jones descended, heavy weight that he was, with bended knee to the region where Hyde had his allowance of "fine cut" deposited. The back stairs rattled; one or two mat- tresses throughout the building sank from increased weight and some of the boys, with hunger still haunting them in their dreams, chewed bed covers with a vengeance, between snores; while poor Hyde realized that Jones' fears were confirmed and though not thirsty, he had found a spring in the bed.
So passed the last evening in Old Ferry Hall. It was now past midnight and Duncan Dunn awoke with the feeling that bed clothes in a tropical climate were a nuisance. He rubbed his eyes and then discovered that a radiance shone from his geometry on the table. The leaf that contained, "If a plane is perpendicular to one of two parallel lines it is perpendicular to the other," soon burst into flame; the result, as he supposed, of too much hard study in the evening. His thermometer was slowly rising. It had already passed the de- merit line and in desperation he thrust it into the water pitcher; but here he was seized with an inordinate desire to move out and he be- gan to put his desire into immediate execution. He visited his closest neighbors, explained his desires and reasons and soon his whole floor had concluded to follow his worthy example. They were tired of the rule of "Proctors" and decided to move and move quickly. So a crash, mingled with the sounds of hurrying feet and a Babel of voices was borne to the upper floor. Bateman rolled over and muttered, "Those fellows must be having a deuce of a time down on 'first! Wish they'd let a fellow sleep," and then another snore, but "Ring the bell! Fire! Fire!" brought him to his feet, and al- though if he had been going to roll some "new 'un" he could have found the way out perfectly, he now stood bumping up against the
133
wall like the proverbial lodge goat. We now came out of our holes like squirrels in the spring time. We for once had all the heat we wanted and could open our doors as wide as we pleased. Some grabbed the hose and watched the little stream of H2 O pour out about as fast as though some one were pouring it in at the other end with a bucket. Others went to the campus to see if it were really going to burn, while most of them became infatuated with Dunn's idea to move. All became so sooner or later, and while this was going on many things were done that very closely resembled the ridiculous. Of course they were never known, it was only the sublime that came to light. Denton Crow was bothered for some time about his cuffs, but they turned up all right and he appeared upon the campus in due time in full dress. Hamilton and Mash- burn took time to sort their pictures and stack their uniforms in the middle of the room. Bateman, as he threw his watch from the third story exclaimed, "Catch my watch! I'll bring my bed!" Joe Win- ston threw his wash bowl and pitcher from the window while his brother Crossen exclaimed with delight as he reached College Hall, "I've saved the footballs and the coal oil can!"
But the leading feature was the "trunk parade." There were big trunks, little trunks, old trunks, new trunks, filled trunks, empty trunks, trunks on shoulders, trunks being dragged, and trunks go- ing down "regardless of cost." No one was directing the procession and it gave way for no one. Many the toe that was sore from its effects. Move and move quickly, was the sole pervading idea. Even Cummings found there was something he must obey, and moved. The beautiful part was, everyone moved in time, and we sat about on the campus during the last moments of Ferry Hall and warbled. "There'll be a hot time in the old town tonight," without a ghastly face appearing at an upper window with a cry for help.
We were the attraction of the hour. People from town who had never visited us before, came running to see us now. The young ladies called on us, and old men, who had not run a footrace for years, came near killing themselves in their mad rush up the hill. At last there was a terrific explosion! Dave had forgotten his de-
134
merit board and now Ferry Hall was no more. We decided then to hold chapel, although several hours early. President Bryan, however, was in his accustomed place with his contrary lock of hair several degrees nearer the perpendicular than usual. "There were others" with similar locks. Dudes were scarce and negligee shirts were in the majority, and upon closer inspection they showed that they had all been made from a night shirt pattern. But we were all there; some not quite as presentable as we would have liked, and after accepting the invitations of our kind town friends to spend the rest of the night, we left the chapel and after a last long gaze at the ruins of our old "Dorm," and most of our earthly belongings, we wandered off down the hill to find new homes, with kind of a sad, longing feeling playing around our hearts. In the morning when we had to draw on our wet shoes without any socks, we found that the old "Dorm." had not been such a bad place after all, and one of the poets who had escaped with his muse exclaimed:
"Things have surely changed, That is, so I've been told.
We used to dress by the radiator,
But now, we dress in the cold !"
135
136
LORA DELL MALONE 99.
FIRST ANNIVERSARY OF THE BURNING OF FERRY HALL.
FACULTY VS. SENIORS.
In the afternoon of Thursday, the 19th, the faculty, by mutual agreement, decided to celebrate the coming end of the four years' war which they have been waging with the seniors by a test of skill and awkwardness on the diamond.
The game was called promptly at 2:30, Professor Fulmer being first at the bat. He knocked McCroskey a fly, which so surprised Mc that he fumbled the ball and let the professor score, to be ten- derly borne to the lemonade stand by his friends. Webster made a wild two-bagger strike, but got nipped in a cold-blooded commer- cial manner just before he got to second. Darrow took base on four balls, but got a fuse blown out just as he was about to make a com- plete circuit. Piper took base on balls, and scored. Heileman tried to reduce the ball to its primitive elements, but had to content him- self with scoring. Watt clutched wildly at the air with the bat for
137
two chances, but finally struck and boldly scored, and was consoled by Miss Howard. Spillman nearly ended Umpire Fudge's career with a foul, but raised a crop of one score. H.SO4, Whole-arm Movement, Three-wire System and Botany each scored in their turn. Heileman was given a base to analyze on wild balls, but gave up the experiment and went home in disgust. Waller struck a ball at a tangent of X over McCroskey, but Me got onto his cosine, and caught him out, giving the Seniors the place at the bat, with Whole- arm Movement in the box and H2SO, behind the bat.
McCroskey struck wild, took base and scored on wild balls. Tannatt took base on business-like curves. Doolittle fouled, struck fly, but was caught out by Piper. Philips' brief but dazzling career was ended by light strike, and he, too, was caught out. Miss Howard rooted till she nearly upset the lemonade stand, and amid mingled groans and yells from the crowd, the Seniors again took the field.
McCroskey threw a curve which gave him curvature of the biceps, and Thompson succeeded to the box. Fulmer struck well, but Philips nailed the ball. Webster took first on strike, stole second on Senior strategy, and very nonchalantly walked over to third, but succumbed in the attempt to get home. Darrow made a good strike, but McCroskey's internal resistance was too high, and the current failed, giving the professors another chance to try their luck in the field.
During the remainder of the game, to go into the details of which would more than consume space and reader's patience, prac- tically the same tactics were gone through. Botany played him- self out early in the game, and our venerable Ph. D. took his place. The doctor is a star player and distinguished himself on various oc- casions. The game went steadily against the aspiring Seniors until the end, when the score showed 46 to 14 in favor of the faculty.
The most refreshing feature of the day was the lemonade stand, which, under the management of Miss Howard, refreshed the play- ers and amused the crowd, besides assisting very materially in a financial way. The great play of the day was made by Tannatt, in the last inning, who actually made a home run. Observations and
138
criticisms by the crowd were numerous, and a few have been dished up for the benefit of the reader, which are as follows:
"Bugology (Doane) at the bat, and H2O on deck." Darrow at bat-"Look out or you'll blow out a fuse."
"Belshazzar (Egge) at the bat and Logarithins (Waller) on deck."
"Now get the muscular movement, PURE and SIMPLE."
"Look out. Darrow, you've got three guages on the smoke- stack, and your voltage is running high."
"Watch the chemical reaction on the molecule."
"Molecule at the bat, and cabbages on deck."
"Don't hit Watt on the head, or you'll skin the ball."
"Smoke up, Darrow, that's not the origin of species."
139
COLLEGE EXPERIMENT STATION
Staff Antin
CHINOOK STAFF ARTIST.
×
HAT
HEAT, LIGHT AND POWER PLANT.
140
Song of the Chinook.
While the world lies sleeping in Winter's arms 'Neath his snowy blanket of white; And the cold, cold spell of his icy charms Holds its frozen sway o'er hamlets and farms, And the frost glitters keen and bright.
With a more subtle magic than Winter knows, I come up from the mild southwest To shatter the spell of the cruel snows, And loosen the world from their deadly throes, At the bid of my fell bebest
I whirl over hilltop and plain and dale In the burst of my hey-day glee, To banish the reign of King Boreas hale With the furious blast of my sweeping gale, And he hastens away from me.
I sway the tall pines in the mountains high, And toss their crests in the air ; Then down to the level plains I fly And greet the bare hills as I whistle by, With a promise of springtime fair.
I dance o' er the valleys in eddies and whirls, And waken the sleeping earth ; I kiss the red cheeks of the farmer girls, And ruthlessly toss their tangled curls, In my blustering, jovial mirth.
And in my wake, in a jubilant throng Come the birds from far and near. They hear my voice as I whirl along, And hasten with chirp, and twitter, and song, To join in the season's cheer.
The buttercups hear my airy tread And waken up out of sleep, And the bright-eyed daisy lifts her head, While crocus and snowdrop peep from their bed ' Neath their snowy coverlids deep.
All Nature responds to my jovial call And welcomes my cheery blast, Till all living creatures great and small Leap forth when I banish grim Winter's thrall, And Springtime has come at last.
141
Broodsharkin
A
Woods - Larkim
Jie Nay . Dar Promise of 42 Fulfilled .
nosflavia
3
Keep off the Grass
The travel Walks Were finner the Chinook Came You been.
EVOLUTION OF COLLEGE WALKS.
B
D
AAA
١٠
A few improvements - There Could be more . -
Falouse Son
chay Depasser
Rock formations
-Cross Section of Campus near"College Hall - Made G.13.1899. Showing Different Strate - - also Geological discoveries near 3 Sidewalk.
Our Seniors-As We Know Them.
NASLE
AGE.
FAVORITE AMINTIOX DRINK.
HOBBY.
VOCATION.
PERSONAL. PECULIARITY.
FAVORITE QUOTATION.
CAUSE OF DEATH.
ST PETER'S GREETING
Mabel Taylor
Sweet Sixteen.
bregin.
To hoe beans
Growling et the Profs.
Consoling THISC.
Lovely. f esh : " Je t'aime." , Fanily Cares, paraffine gum and green. and erawl in
V. T. MeC oskey
A Suck- ling
the ig. Clabber. Tostand in Chewing with the . girls
Spark artester.
Wise from the "Iam to my- self dearer than a friend."
Hard work. Go to, l'saith,
Doma Lobaugh.
: Disputed
Milk.
To be an Cold munid.
Photogra- phy.
Coaching senior Preps.
tx loquacious "Much study as a llock of geese.
: is a wearit.ess of the flesh "
St. P .: Did you pony in trig .? Enlargement 0. the brain. D. L .: Noxir-ee St. P : You're ton gnod for here.
Byron Hunter
Marti- (age)
l'op.
To raise a family of
Improve- ment of the race.
Tending the baby.
Hen- pecked demeanor.
"The saddest words of longne or pen are these, ' It High! ha e (different).
G rman.
The next Hoor to the left and go below.
145
Lorn Malone
Dot (nge) 1
Soup.
To look fnir in the sight of men
Alcohol
Caring for her rap and KOWI
Cogitative ine- ulties Im- mersed ju eu- bibbundity of cogitation.
"Take my Joke upon you."
Blasted nifee- tions
You're a warm number.
Samuel Huntting
Methust- 11., $ 04 alistic
To rock the cradle.
Girls.
Whirling on a shaft at a rate Betrayed in- of 4000 revolu- tions per nocence minute.
:"tirent r men and died from Come in and than I may congestion of chaperon the have lived, but crowd. I doubt it." medulla ob- longata.
Anna El is
*
Tea with 8 stick itt it.
To graduate :
Raising par- ticular -!
Short but sweet.
"That I might sleep out this great gap of time.
Went crazy on religion.
There's a place reserved for you in the o her Dep't
Seaton Van Doren
Minor.
sex. Soothing ' To be 2nd The gentle Syrup.
Lieut to Coxer.
Eating.
Run down at the feet.
"I hear a hol- low sound, who rapped my skull?"
Eloped with another man's wife.
Your face is against you.
A. D. E. Elmer
Undis- covered
Something warm.
Toget Married.
Reforms.
Growling at the insti- tution.
Weirs government socks.
"1 bu n.lpine, I perish, if I achieve not this young modest girl."
Measles.
Walk in. You are a rose among many thorns.
10
Spit out that
top of his head up.
1
teen.
:
Tried to think:
F.xams.
At the W. A. C.
Hurry, hurry, toil and flurry, Working for an A. He's a little Freshman, As any one would say.
Hurry, hurry, toil and flurry, Working for a B, A proud but anxious Soph, As you are sure to see.
Hurry, hurry, toil and flurry, Grateful for a C. He's got to be a Junior, As plain as plain can be.
Hurry, hurry, toil and flurry, Working for B. S. Whether he will get it, Can any of you guess ?
146
"AN EPISODE."
Years and years ago, when the class of '98 lived and thrived in the W. A. C., there were two youths of this illustrious class who thought themselves "head push" in everything. But many others were of an opinion exactly opposite to this. So said a Prep., "Let's duck 'em, it'll do 'em good!" and thereupon a conspiracy was en- tered into by four stalwart boys to duck the unsuspecting of the class of '98.
"O conspiracy,
Shamest thou to show thy dangerous brow by night, When evils are most free? O then by day When wilt thou find a cavern dark enough To mask thy monstrous visage?"
This was in the good old days of Ferry Hall, when boys and girls mingled together at meal time in laughter and merriment in
147
the beloved dining room. It was on a Sunday evening after supper that the two youths in question strolled leisurely over to Stevens Hall with two young ladies.
The night was dark and dreary, and it is said that cloud bursts often occur on just such nights.
After bidding the ladies an affectionate farewell, the young gentlemen returned, going by way of the rear north entrance of the Ad. building. Upon the balcony, just above the entrance, were sta- tioned the conspirators, each with an overflowing bucket of water. As they passed by on the walk below the very clouds of the heavens seemed to open, and such a downpour of water was a thing entirely unexpected. "Help!" shouted the victims, as they were swept vio- lently off the walk. And oh, those Sunday clothes! Meanwhile the perpetrators of the awful josh retreated into the darkness of the Ad. building. And the Shakespearean quotations and Biblical exclama- tions from below resounded with increasing nearness through the chambers of the basement. Up, up, sped the miscreants until they found themselves in the tower behind a barricaded door. And up, up, came the victims, muttering in accents wild and broken. And then stillness fell like a buzzard's feather from the heavens upon the people below. A hurried consultation was heard in the hall without, in whispers suppressed and tragic. At length retreating footsteps told the water throwers that the injured ones had departed from the scene of action. Finally, issuing forth from the tower, with empty buckets, they were met by a hostile demonstration from the victims, who. having provided themselves with a revolver, claw- hammer, and an old lantern, came charging up the steps with ter- rific determination.
"But oh, what a fall was there!" The revolver failed to revolve, the claw-hammer failed to claw, and the young gentlemen rolled down the steps with motion fearfully accelerated. Gathering them- selves together in the hall below, they timidly ventured to ascend the steps and observe their tormenters, but a palisade of empty
148
water buckets from above necessitated a hasty retreat. Whereupon all the water throwers made their escape by way of the rain pipe, ex- cept one poor fellow who in his excitement ran out onto the balcony and made a wild leap into the darkness of the night.
The next day one member of the institution had several scars on his face, but where he found them or how he came by them we are yet to learn. The true cause of this trouble was a small lump of jealousy that had grown up between the offenders and the offended.
149
A Tragedy.
Hat thief, how could you so cruel be As to steal that old cap from me ? The racks and nails are all left bare, And now I have nothing to wear. For days and weeks I've hung it here, Without ever one doubt or fear. My rubbers went. Did I complain ? Even to walking in the rain Without umbrella, which I gave To you, this same unfeeling knave. But this I can not -will not bear. My only hat I can not spare. O, must I to the major bow, And see if he'll mercy allow ? Oh, must I wear a hat to drill ? I can't! I won't! My heart be still ! Methinks to dinner I'll be late. O, disaster, thou art my mate !
150
THE COLLEGE COMMANDMENTS.
And the President spake all these words, saying: I am thy loving father, which hath come out of the land of Indiana, to thee, my dear boys and my dear girls:
1. Thou shalt not prefer any college to this one.
2. Thou must not make unto thyself any "under estimate" of the character of thy Profs., neither those that are literary, nor those that are scientific, nor any that are connected with this college, for thy Profs. are jealous Profs., visiting the iniquity of "undervaluing their worth" upon the student, even to his third and fourth college years.
3. Thou must not consider the extra work given by Prof. Barry as vain, for he will mark that student as incomplete that hold- eth his work as vain.
4. Remember the Sabbath day to hustle in it; in six days shalt thou do thy library reading, thy laboratory work and sit upon the benches, but the seventh day is dedicated to the Profs .; in it thou shalt write all thy essays, copy thy note books and get thy "Shake." For during six days the Profs. read many books and make wondrous observations, but on the seventh day they compile their results, wherefore the students are compelled to hustle on that day.
5. Write long and loving letters to thy parents, that thou mayest receive many bank checks from home, and thy days may be long within these walls which the legislature hath given thee.
6. Thou shalt not use ponies in Trig.
7. Thou shalt not flirt.
8. Thou shalt not play "rough" in football.
9. Thou shalt not roast thy Profs.
10. Thou shalt not covet any Senior's gown, nor his wisdom, nor his solid girl, nor his pony, nor anything that is the Senior's.
Now may these words abide with you, my children, that you may all grow up to be meek Seniors. Amen.
151
OUR FRIENDS.
"That you do love me, I am nothing jealous."-Mabel Taylor. "Why, man, he doth bestride the narrow world like a colossus." -F. Harrison.
"In youth when I did love, did love,
Methought it was so very sweet."-Prof. Webster.
"Sweet friends, your patience for my long abode."-Virgil Me- Croskey.
"Love; his affections do not turn that way."-Orville Adams.
"She is importunate; indeed distract.
Her moods will needs be pitied."-Our Registrar.
"I am fearfully, wonderfully made." -- Prof. Barry.
"Who steals my purse, steals trash."-Chinook Board.
"Some may come and some may go, But I stay here forever."-Anna Ellis.
"Much ado about nothing."-Military Department.
"The liberal soul shall be made fat."-Prof. Darrow.
"Much study is a weariness of the flesh."-Frank Baker
"What's in a name?"-William Martin Van Schaack Duncan.
"I would the gods had made thee poetical."-Nalder.
"The sounding jargon of the school."-Joint Debate. "Oh that this too, too solid flesh would melt."-Cummings. "Midnight shout and revelry,
Tipsy dance and jollity."-Senior Prom.
"The old man eloquent." -- Totten.
"Study to be quiet."-Dan Smythe.
"Sweetness long drawn out."-Anna Grimes.
"He would pun thee into shivers."-Prof. Spillman.
"There's small choice in rotten apples."-Junior Additions.
152
"One may smile and smile and be a villain."-Prof. Watt.
"Alas! He is too young."-Prof. Barnum.
"He has a face like a benediction."-Prof. Shedd.
"If dirt were trumps, what hands you'd hold!"-Foundry Student.
"But this place is too cold for hell!"-W. A. C. Chapel.
"A comedy of errors." -- A "Chem. Lab." Note Book.
"Before I knew thee I knew nothing." -- W. A. C.
"In truth he is but an infant wearing trousers."-Prof. Barnum.
"Nay, you shall find no boy's play here, I can tell you." -- Senior to Prep.
"You must come in earlier o' nights."-The Preceptress.
"O. hard condition!"-Physics.
"I cut it for pleasure."-Officers' School.
"All the learned and authentic fellows."-The Faculty.
"He was a man of unbounded stomach."-Goodsell.
"And thou art long and lank and brown
Need help finding more records? Try our genealogical records directory which has more than 1 million sources to help you more easily locate the available records.