USA > Ohio > Lucas County > Toledo > Hubbell's Toledo blue book: a family and social directory of Toledo and vicinity 1910 > Part 14
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The answer to a home wedding invitation must be sent to the bride's parents. The envelope containing the answer to an invitation should be addressed to the hostess, not to the host and hostess. An invitation to a church wed- ding does not need a written reply, but it is courteous to acknowledge the fact that one has been remembered; there- fore cards should be sent to the bride's parents if the address is known, and to the newly married pair on the day of the wedding or immediately after. If preferred, cards may be left later at the mother's house, but without asking for any one.
If a previous engagement cannot be offered when writ- ing a formal refusal, and yet there exists some good rea- son for not accepting, the words may be "regret that they are unable to accept the very kind invitation," etc. It is not correct to say "will be unable." The fact of the re- fusal rests in the present, not in the future. Answers to invitations are not written on cards. It is exceedingly bad
Investment Securities-telephone or write for our list The Citizens' Safe Deposit and Trust Company GARDNER BUILDING
THE
HOME SAVINGS BANK
HERBERT BAKER PRESIDENT
Capital $250,000 Surplus $125,000 Commercial Accounts Savings Accounts Letters of Credit and Travelers' Cheques
- Superior Street and Madison
Ave.
RIEGEL & ROWLAND SOLE TOLEDO AGENTS DUNTLEY STANDARD VACUUM CLEANER 940-41 OHIO BUILDING HOME PHONE MAIN 1598
244
THE TOLEDO BLUE BOOK
form to enclose a card with "Regrets," or "Accepts" writ- ten on it.
The rule is to send a wedding invitation to Mr. and Mrs. C., a separate one to the Misses C., and a separate one to each young man in the family. It is not proper to address "Mr. and Mrs. C. and family."
Invitations to be sent by mail are enclosed in an outer envelope. The inner envelope is addressed to Mr. and Mrs. C., the outer envelope bears the full name and ad- dress. When wedding invitations or cards for large re- ceptions are to be delivered by hand, each invitation has but one envelope, without mucilage, and unsealed, and addressed with street address. An invitation to a dinner is sealed.
For a birthday party a young girl may write informal notes to her friends: My dear Mary :
I am asking a few friends to spend Thursday evening, May ninth, with me, to celebrate my birthday, and it will give me much pleasure if you and your brother will come at eight o'clock. Cordially yours,
Margaret Lawrence
A girl may, with her mother's approval, write a note of this sort:
My dear Mr. White :
My mother wishes me to say that it will give her much pleasure if you will spend Saturday evening, September fifteenth, with us, very informally.
We are asking a few friends to meet Miss Rose Post, who is staying with us, and we hope to see you at half after eight o'clock. Yours sincerely,
Helen Field
LADIES' ACCOUNTS ESPECIALLY SOLICITED The National Bank of Commerce MADISON AND ST. CLAIR
THE LASALLE & KOCH CO. Toledo's Leading Dry Goods House
JEFFERSON AVE. AND SUPERIOR ST.
ETIQUETTE NOTES 245
Young girls may issue invitations for luncheons for their girl friends, either by formal or informal notes. An informal note may be:
My dear Marian :
May I have the pleasure of your company at luncheon on Thursday, December twenty-first, at half after one o'clock?
Yours sincerely, Edith Holt
Note-writing
Plain white or cream paper, rather thick in quality, unruled, and folded once to fit the envelope is in good taste. Persons in mourning use paper and envelopes with mourning border three-eighths of an inch wide, or with a narrow line, according to the depth or period of mourn- ing. Postal cards are not for social usage, and typewrit- ing is strictly for business.
The address may be engraved in Roman letters across the head of the paper, or a small monogram may be used. If there is no engraved address it may be written at the head of the page towards the right.
Envelopes have no ornamentation. Handwriting should be legible, the vertical or angular style, or the small round letters being equally in fashion at present. Words are separated distinctly, and are written in straight lines. Writing is not crowded at the margin, nor are words divided from one line to the next.
A note is begun about two inches from the top of the paper, and a margin is left at the foot of the page. A new subject in a note requires a new paragraph, and in beginning a paragraph a margin of about an inch is al- lowed. It is best to write straight on from page to page, rather than to skip about from one page to another.
ALL THINGS CHANGE TO SOMETHING NEW TO SOMETHING STRANGE
RICKENBAUGH
820 Madison
CLEVER CONCEPTIONS MASTER MAKERS
THE HOME SAVINGS
BANK
Offers its Patrons
Every Modern Conven- ience for the Prompt Transaction of Business in all its Depart- ments
=
Superior Street and Madison
Ave.
For Sale-ELECTRIC VACUUM CLEANERS-For Rent RIEGEL & ROWLAND
940-41 OHIO BUILDING
HOME PHONE MAIN 1598
246
THE TOLEDO BLUE BOOK
Signatures are written in full and never with a prefix. Abbreviations or pet names are incorrect in signatures or addresses. It is bad form to sign "Susie," "Birdie," "Bessie," or to address an envelope to "Jno.," "Jas.," or "Chas.," etc. A bad habit is to use the sign "&" for "and," or to crowd the word "and" vertically between words.
In a date the name of the month is written in full; the date of the month must be in numerals when the date of the year follows, or may be written when the year is omitted. It is an affectation to write out the year in full. Numerals are used for it.
In addressing an envelope to a man the form is, Richard Wood, Esq. A woman is not addressed by her husband's title. An address is, Mrs. William Green, not Mrs. Dr. Green or Mrs. Gen. Green. A widow is addressed as Mrs. George Smith, not Mrs. Anna Smith. The sign # before a street number is obsolete, and the abbreviation "No." before figures is not in use. The word "Street" is used, not "St." One does not write "City" on social notes. The street address is considered sufficient on local notes. One should write words in full and not use the abbreviations Wash., Cin., Balt., or Phila.
Notes can be cordial without being gushing or effusive .. The best rule is to write notes of acknowledgment for wedding gifts with as little delay as possible, before the feeling of pleasure in the receipt of gifts has subsided. It is well to mention the gift definitely - the charming clock, the beautiful silver dish, the attractive cut-glass vase, the handsome lamp, the lovely piece of silver. Peo- ple like to have their gift specialized, and adjectives of enthusiasm are allowable.
GAIN IN DEPOSITS FOR PAST YEAR OVER 30% The National Bank of Commerce MADISON AND ST. CLAIR
FRAMING Done by us is not only Artistic but First Class The Mohr Art Co. 817 Madison Ave.
ETIQUETTE NOTES 247
When a gift is received from a husband and wife a note is written to the wife. Something in this form may be a suggestion to a bride-elect:
My dear Mrs. Park :
The gift which you and Mr. Park have so kindly sent to me has pleased me more than I can say. It will be a charm_ ing addition to my new home, and often remind me of your friendly thoughtfulness.
Yours cordially, Elizabeth Clarkson
Or one may say: "It was a great pleasure to receive the beautiful clock which you and Mr. Park have so kindly sent to me. I hope I may have the opportunity very soon of telling you personally how much I appreciate your gift."
A form of resignation from a club is in reality an offi- cial communication and may be very concise :
My dear Mrs. Dash :
I regret that circumstances make it impossible for me to retain my membership in the-club after June first.
Will you be so kind as to accept my resignation from that date? Sincerely yours,
Mary Wainright
It is a painful duty to write a note of condolence to a friend who has lost a relative, yet few persons realize how much a note of this sort is valued. The letter is liked better if the writer does not attempt to sermonize. "My thoughts are with you in your sorrow and I am writing to assure you of my deep sympathy," or, "My heart goes out to you in your sorrow," or, "in the blow which has fallen on you," are words which suggest themselves as fitting.
Real Estate Loans The Citizens' Safe Deposit and Trust Company GARDNER BUILDING
THE HOME SAVINGS BANK
Is Equipped in all its Depart- ments to Meet the Demands of the Most Exacting
Superior Street and Madison Ave.
RIEGEL & ROWLAND SOLE TOLEDO AGENTS DUNTLEY STANDARD VACUUM CLEANER 940-41 OHIO BUILDING HOME PHONE MAIN 1598
248
THE TOLEDO BLUE BOOK
A reply to a note of sympathy may be brief but ap- preciative. Something of this sort might be said: My dear Mary:
Your kind letter of sympathy is truly appreciated. It is a great help to know that my friends are thinking of me at this time, and your words are very comforting.
Yours sincerely,
Edith Ward
Friends are invited to card parties by informal notes or formal invitations in the third person, or the card of the hostess may do duty, with the words, "Bridge at three o'clock," or "Euchre at three o'clock," written on the card with the date and R. S. V. P. Guests are expected to re- ply by note, without delay and definitely, to an invitation to a card party. A dressing-room where ladies may leave their wraps should be provided. Hats are not removed at an afternoon party. Gloves are removed when playing cards. A hostess may include many guests in one after- noon by sending invitations for a card party for three o'clock to those who would like to play cards, and send- ing cards for tea at five to others who are averse to card playing but who may be glad to come in later, informally.
A man who is well-bred knows that he must call and leave a letter of introduction with his card, but on no account must enter the house. His duty is to allow the person addressed an opportunity to decide on his merits. A bachelor who acts as host must have a chaperon always for any occasion where ladies are to be present, whether it be a theatre party, supper, or other entertain- ment. His duty is to sit next to the chaperon at the play or at supper. He has the forethought to order the supper in advance and has a table reserved and the account set- tled before going to a restaurant.
TRAVELERS' CHEQUES AND FOREIGN EXCHANGE A SPECIALTY The National Bank of Commerce MADISON AND ST. CLAIR
THE LASALLE & KOCH CO. Toledo's Leading Dry Goods House
JEFFERSON AVE. AND SUPERIOR ST.
ETIQUETTE NOTES 24
A man should leave his hat, overcoat, stick and gloves in the hall when making calls. A lady never accompanies a man to the hall, nor offers assistance with his overcoat.
Wedding Preparations
A church wedding involves more trouble and expense than a home ceremonial. The laws of etiquette require that a bride's family shall pay all the expenses of the weading. The trousseau, invitations, house or church decorations, cost of opening the church, music, awnings, carriages for bridal party, marriage. announcements, no- tices published in newspapers - all these are paid by the bride's parents or nearest relatives.
The bridegroom is permitted to pay for nothing but the ring, the fee to the clergyman, bouquets to bride and bridesmaids, gifts to ushers and best man; also provides the carriage for his best man and himself to go to the church or house on the wedding day.
At a day wedding in a church bridesmaids wear hats. At a home wedding they dispense with hats and wear pretty ornaments in the hair, wreaths or sprays of arti- ficial flowers. "One of the chief duties of bridal attend- ants," remarked a bright woman, "is to keep their wits about them." They are expected to be useful as well as ornamental.
The best man's duties are to be attentive to the in- terests and wishes of the bridegroom. He must accom- pany him to the church, enter the vestry with him, walk beside him, preceded by the clergyman when entering for the ceremony, stand at the bridegroom's left on the chancel step facing the assemblage awaiting the bride, and stand at the bridegroom's right, a few paces back,
PERMANENT DECORATIVE EUROPEAN ART
RICKENBAUGH
820 Madison
CHARACTER HARMONY GRACE CRAFTS- MANSUIP
THE HOME SAVINGS BANK
Invites The
Accounts of Women for the Convenient Care of their Personal and Household
Matters
-
Superior Street and Madison
Ave.
For Sale-ELECTRIC VACUUM CLEANERS-For Rent RIEGEL & ROWLAND
940-41 OHIO BUILDING
HOME PHONE MAIN 1598
250
THE TOLEDO BLUE BOOK
during the ceremony. He keeps the wedding-ring in his waistcoat pocket and gives it to the bridegroom at the required moment. He is entrusted with the fee for the clergyman, and may give it either before or after the ceremony, but in the vestry, not in the church.
'A bride who elects to be married in a traveling dress wears hat and gloves. She does not have bridesmaids. She may have a maid-of-honor, who should not be dressed in white, but should wear a street or reception dress, hat and gloves.
A bride who is a widow does not wear white or a veil, and is not attended by bridesmaids. She wears gray or mauve, with a hat. Usually she chooses to be married in a traveling dress.
When a widow becomes engaged she continues to wear her wedding-ring until the day of her second marriage, when she removes it and puts it away.
If a bride's father is not living and there is no brother or male relative to perform the duty, the bride's mother may give her away. The mother should enter the church before the bridal party and be escorted to a front pew by an usher. At the proper time in the ceremony the bride's mother advances to the altar, gives away her daughter and returns to her seat.
The present fashion is to display wedding gifts a day or two before the wedding, instead of on the wedding day. The bride-elect and her mother write informal notes, asking friends who have sent presents to come in on an afternoon designated. The gifts are arranged on tables and the cards of the givers are with the gifts. The in- formal serving of tea closes the afternoon. When wed- ding gifts are displayed on the wedding day, it is optional
COMPLETE FOREIGN DEPARTMENT The National Bank of Commerce MADISON AND ST. CLAIR
THIS BOOK
Contains the Names of 90% of our Customers The Mohr Art Co. 817 Madison Ave.
ETIQUETTE NOTES 251
whether cards of the givers are with them. It is the invariable custom to have wedding gifts marked with the initial of a bride's maiden name, also her clothing and linen.
Customs at the Table
There is no place where a person's good breeding and early training are more clearly shown than at the table. When taking one's seat at table one takes up the napkin, takes the roll or bread from within it and places it at the left hand, on the table, and lays the napkin partly un- folded across the lap.
Oysters on the shell must be eaten whole, not cut in half. If grapefruit is served an orange spoon should be on the right. The soup spoon is used for soup. Soup should be taken from the side of the spoon, turned away from the eater and sipped noiselessly. Sipping one's soup with a hissing noise is unpardonable, and tilting the soup plate to secure the last spoonful is bad form.
Neither soup nor fish is ever offered twice.
The silver fish knife and fork are now in general use, the knife being necessary in separating the bones from the fish. The fork farthest from the plate is to be used as each course is served. A small portion of meat is cut as required, the knife being retained in the right hand, the fork in the left, the fork held with the prongs down, the handle of the fork resting in the palm of the hand while cutting food or conveying it to the mouth.
All vegetables, peas, tomatoes, etc., are eaten with a fork. When eating vegetables the knife is laid on the plate, the blade resting near the center. The knife must not be placed across the edge of the plate, nor with the
Safe Deposit Boxes for rent-$3.00 per year and upwards The Citizens' Safe Deposit and Trust Company GARDNER BUILDING
THE
HOME SAVINGS BANK
Transacts a General Banking Business
- Savings Accounts, Subject To Check, may be Opened by the Deposit of ONE DOLLAR
- Superior Street and Madison
Ave.
RIEGEL & ROWLAND SOLE TOLEDO AGENTS DUNTLEY STANDARD VACUUM CLEANER HOME PHONE MAIN 1598
940-41 OHIO BUILDING
252
THE TOLEDO BLUE BOOK
handle resting on the table. The fork is then taken in the right hand, the prongs turned up, the handle of the fork resting easily on the hand between the first finger and the thumb. If need be, a crust of bread may be used with the left hand to press a morsel of food towards the fork. It is not an uncommon thing to see a man make a hod of his fork, and, using the knife for a trowel, slap one thing upon another until he gets a full load, which is not always safely carried to the mouth. Take small pieces at a time, and never have so much in your mouth that you cannot speak with ease. When cutting meat the finger must never rest on the blade of the knife but on the handle.
Odd methods of holding the fork should be avoided. The fork is raised laterally to the mouth. It is awkward to crook or project the elbow or to point the fork towards the mouth. Very little food at a time should be taken on the fork. When one has finished eating, the knife and fork are placed close together in the center of the plate, the prongs of the fork turned down.
When drinking water or wine one takes a sip at a time, L not a glassful. Some entrées, such as cutlets or soft-shell crabs, require the aid of a knife for cutting; but for pat- ties, timbales, sweetbreads or croquettes a fork only is used.
Asparagus may be taken up in the fingers by the stalks, but the later custom is to cut off the points with knife and fork. Lettuce should be cut with a fork, the portion of the leaf rolled up and thus eaten. Soft cheeses should be eaten with a fork, or a morsel may be put on a piece of bread with a knife and thus conveyed to the mouth with the fingers. It is allowable to take up a morsel of cheese in the fingers, but it is best to use a fork.
THE ONLY NATIONAL BANK WITH A SAVINGS DEPARTMENT The National Bank of Commerce MADISON AND ST. CLAIR
THE LASALLE & KOCH CO. Toledo's Leading Dry Goods House JEFFERSON AVE. AND SUPERIOR ST.
ETIQUETTE NOTES 253
Small birds, such as quail and squab, are served whole, one for each person, and one cuts the meat from the breast and eats each piece at the time of cutting it.
Whenever possible a fork should be used for dessert in preference to a spoon. The dessert spoon is for berries, peaches and cream, preserves, custards, jellies, etc.
With the dessert plate is brought the small silver, lay- ing it down at the right and left. After the dessert, the fruit plate is brought. A finger-bowl rests on the plate, and one removes the finger-bowl and the tiny doily which is beneath it, placing them at the left on the table.
Roman punch is eaten with a spoon. An olive is taken up in the fingers to be eaten with a few bites without tak- ing the stone in the mouth.
Pears, apples or peaches should be peeled with a silver knife, cut in quarters, and the pieces taken up in the fingers. Fruit which is very juicy had best be eaten with a fork. After peeling a banana it is best to cut the fruit in pieces and eat them with a fork. Oranges are cut in halves and eaten with an orange spoon.
Watermelon is served as a separate course at dessert and is eaten with a fork.
When grapes are eaten the seeds and skins must be removed quietly with the fingers.
Cherry stones may be disposed of quietly behind the half-closed hand by allowing them to fall into the fingers. This applies to fresh cherries. Preserved cherries are eaten with a dessert-spoon, and the stones must be unob- trusively removed from one's mouth into the spoon and placed at the side of the plate. Plums are taken in the fingers of the right hand and a few bites of the fruit are taken without taking the stone in the mouth.
EUROPE EXCELS THE WORLD IN ART
RICKENBAUGH
Manufacturers' Agent 820 Madison
TABLEWARE HOME DECORATIONS, HOUSE LIGHTS, CLEVER NOVELTIES
THE HOME SAVINGS BANK
The Bank For Women Convenient Location
Attractive Quarters Courteous, Painstaking Attention from all its Officers and Employees
- Superior Street and Madison
Ave.
For Sale - ELECTRIC VACUUM CLEANERS-For Rent RIEGEL & ROWLAND
940-41 OHIO BUILDING
HOME PHONE MAIN 1598
254
THE TOLEDO BLUE BOOK
If cake is served at dessert, one takes it on the plate with the dessert, breaks off a small piece and takes it up in the fingers to eat. Before leaving the table one dips the tips of the fingers lightly in the finger-bowl and dries them on the napkin, and may touch the moist finger-tips to the lips and touch a corner of the napkin to the lips. When rising from the table one leaves the napkin unfolded at the left of one's plate.
A hostess rises first and the others rise simultaneously. One should be seated from the side of the chair which is nearest when approaching, and may rise from either side, or from the side nearest the exit from the dining-room, as it is awkward to rise and walk around one's chair. The chair should not be pushed back in place after one has risen from the table.
It is not polite to appear to be in haste to begin eating, but it is allowable to begin when served. It is not polite to continue to eat after others have finished
Sauce, vegetables, etc., are taken on one's plate with the meat, not in separate saucers. Coffee is sometimes served before the guests leave the table, but the better custom is to have it passed later in the drawing-room. In either case the small coffee-cups, sugar and cream are passed on the tray. A small coffee-spoon is laid on each saucer.
At breakfast or luncheon a small bread and butter plate may be placed at the left of each place at the table. A slice of bread should never be spread with butter; one breaks off a small piece of the bread or roll, butters it and eats it. Butter is not used at dinner; neither is a bread plate used then.
Bad habits at table are playing with the silver, crum- bling the bread, or cutting it with a knife, or eating it between courses as though one were hungry.
CAPITAL, $1,000,000.00 The National Bank of Commerce MADISON AND ST. CLAIR
YOUR NAME
In this Book means that YOU should Patronize The Mohr Art Co. 817 Madison Ave.
ETIQUETTE NOTES 255
Unpardonable habits are leaving a teaspoon in a cup even for a moment, or sipping tea or coffee from a spoon. The spoon may be used to stir the tea a moment and is then placed on the saucer, and a sip of tea taken from the cup.
Salt is never distributed on the food on one's plate. A little salt is taken from a saltcellar with a salt-spoon and placed on one side of the plate and used as required on portions of food.
The correct way to eat a boiled egg is to place it in a small egg-cup which holds the egg on end and eat the egg from the shell, cracking the large end with the spoon and taking off a piece of shell large enough to admit the, egg- spoon.
At luncheon bouillon is served in cups and is taken with a spoon; the spoon may be put down and the cup raised to the lips for the last spoonfuls.
When a plate is passed for a second serving the knife and fork are left on it placed close together.
The leaves of artichokes are picked off with the fin- gers and the ends opposite the tops are eaten. Lettuce should not be cut up, but handled with the fork only.
Protect your valuables. Safe Deposit Boxes for rent-$3.00 per year and upwards The Citizens' Safe Deposit and Trust Company GARDNER BUILDING
THE HOME SAVINGS BANK
HERBERT BAKER PRESIDENT
- Capital $250,000
Surplus $125,000 Commercial Accounts Savings Accounts Letters of Credit and Travelers' Cheques
- Superior Street
and Madison
Ave.
RIEGEL & ROWLAND SOLE TOLEDO AGENTS DUNTLEY STANDARD VACUUM CLEANER 940-41 OHIO BUILDING HOME PHONE MAIN 1598
256
THE TOLEDO BLUE BOOK
TOLEDO HOSPITAL
COMMITTEES 1909
Finance
Mrs. S. O. Richardson, Ch.
Mrs. James Secor
Mrs. Mars Nearing
Mrs. C. T. Lewis
Mrs. Wm. Hardee
Mrs. W. B. Scott
Laundry
Mrs. M. M. Miller, Ch.
Mrs. G. Van Vleck
Mrs. R. Pew
Linen
Mrs. Thos. Tracy, Ch.
Mrs. G. Detwiler
Mrs. E. Hiett
Mrs. D. Jamieson
Mrs. R. Pew
Mrs. L. V. Mckesson
Mrs. H. R. T. Radcliffe
Mrs. C. T. Lewis
Nominating
Mrs. W. S. Thurstin, Ch.
Auditing Mrs. S. C. Schenck, Ch. Mrs. J. G. Gould Mrs. Ammi Mitchell
Nurses' Home
Mrs. Wm. Hardee, Ch. Mrs. S. O. Richardson
Building Mrs. S. C. Schenck, Ch. Mrs. J. G. Gould
Press
Mrs. M. J. Riggs, Ch. Mrs. H. R. T. Radcliffe
Supply
Miss M. Hamm, Ch.
Mrs. L. V. Mckesson
Mrs. P. C. Tiedeman
Mrs. Jay Secor
Mrs. Thomas Percy
Mrs. Jamieson
ASSETS NEARLY $8,000,000.00 The National Bank of Commerce MADISON AND ST. CLAIR
THE LASALLE & KOCH CO. Toledo's Leading Dry Goods House JEFFERSON AVE. AND SUPERIOR ST.
THE TOLEDO HOSPITAL
257
COMMITTEES-Continued
Training School
Mrs. J. G. Gould, Ch. Mrs. J. B. Ketcham Mrs. M. M. Miller
Executive
Mrs. W. S. Thurstin, Ch.
Mrs. James Secor
Mrs. S. O. Richardson
Mrs. J. G. Gould
Mrs. M. J. Riggs
Mrs. H. R. T. Radcliffe
Mrs. S. C. Schenck
Inspection Mrs. James Secor, Ch.
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