USA > Massachusetts > Commonwealth history of Massachusetts, colony, province and state, volume 1 > Part 28
Note: The text from this book was generated using artificial intelligence so there may be some errors. The full pages can be found on Archive.org (link on the Part 1 page).
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19 | Part 20 | Part 21 | Part 22 | Part 23 | Part 24 | Part 25 | Part 26 | Part 27 | Part 28 | Part 29 | Part 30 | Part 31 | Part 32 | Part 33 | Part 34 | Part 35 | Part 36 | Part 37 | Part 38 | Part 39 | Part 40 | Part 41 | Part 42 | Part 43 | Part 44 | Part 45 | Part 46 | Part 47 | Part 48 | Part 49 | Part 50 | Part 51 | Part 52 | Part 53 | Part 54
FAMILY LIFE
During the first fifty years of the settlement, family life was . rigorously safe-guarded by authority. Men who had left their wives in England or were otherwise living apart from their families were summarily called to account. The court records of Massachusetts, which have fortunately been preserved for our enlightenment, have lifted the roofs, as it were, from mul- titudes of seventeenth century houses and shown us fully what was going on inside. Human nature being ever the same, crimes and misdemeanors were to be expected, and they were
297
FAMILY LIFE
not confined to the male portion of the population. There are many instances of marital infelicity. One man, in 1642, for not living with his wife was acquitted when he made known to the court that "his mother was not willing to Lett his wife come." A husband and wife were condemned to the stocks for not living peaceably together, she being rebuked for "gad- ding abroad" too much. A husband presented, in 1664, com- plained that "a woman ought to be a meet help for a man," and if his wife would "stay at home, dress his victuals, wash his clothes and do by him as by a husband, he would allow her to see her friends as much as she desired." Men were ordered to send for their wives as soon as they could save enough to pay for their passage. On the other hand there were those who had importuned their wives many months to come, but without avail. Governor Winthrop had no patience with a woman who would allow the sea to separate her from the man of her choice. He wrote of one, in 1632, "I marvayle at her womans weaknesse, that she will live miserably with her children there when she might live comfortably with her husband here." One of the clergy helplessly acknowledged that he had fasted and prayed for his wife to change her mind, which led Margaret Winthrop to remark, "I marvel what matter she is made of."
A contemporary account exists of the infinite care and at- tention some men exerted in transporting their families across the ocean. In a letter of instructions written by Osman Dutch of Gloucester to his wife, he gave in detail minutest directions as to her disposal of his estate in England and what she would require for the passage over. "Seing it hath pleased God to bless me here in this land since I came last, I thanke God, I have cleared 40 1. and shall be able to make good provision for to intertaine you my children, as I hope in the Lord. There- fore I desire you would by all meanes come over to me with the children by the fall or as soone as you can the next spring : To that end and purpose I have hereinclosed sent you an As- signement of the house and therein a deed of gift also of the goods, sealed before our honoured Governor wherewithall I have intrusted yor kinsman Mr. Thomas Bishop, the haber- dasher, whome I Doe intreate to sell the house at as good advantage as he can and such of the goods as are not fitt for
298
WOMEN OF MASSACHUSETTS
transportation, and with the money to make provision for yor coming, for clothes for yourself the children & for some re- freshments by the way, and for your passage: Of the goods that you have there with you sell not any brasse, pewter, bed- ding nor linnen : but furnish yor selfe with these as well as you can."
After telling her how she may get more money if neces- sary through his agents in London, he continues : "You must take care that by the way you may have some refreshments besides the ships provision for yorselfe and my children : that is some suger and fine ruske or bisket, and a little barrell of ale to make warme meate, and oatmeale & currants & a little spice, and some fine flower & eggs & a few chickens with a henne or two and a little butter & honey."
FAMILY TROUBLES
Domestic disturbances were frequently brought before the courts of the colonies. One goodwife, for cursing and re- viling her son-in-law, was equally guilty with another who laid hands on her husband "to the damage of his life," and was ordered chained to a post and allowed only "to come to the place of Gods worship," until her repentance. One Ipswich wife received no doubt a just punishment for breaking her husband's head and threatening to kill him, "so that he is ever weary of his life." So, too, Bridget Oliver, (who fifteen years later as Bridget Bishop was to pay the extreme penalty for witchcraft) for calling her husband "old rogue and old devil" on Lord's days was ordered to stand with her spouse, back to back, on a lecture day in the market place, both gagged for about an hour with a paper fastened to each of their fore- heads, upon which their offence should be fairly written. A Taunton dame, in 1654, was presented for reviling her hus- band, "egging her children to help her, bidding them knock him in the head and wishing his victuals might choake him."
Divorces occurred, but they were not numerous. Especially along the seacoast, the perils of the deep made many widows; when husbands did not return after several years, they were given up as dead, and the widows allowed to marry again. The courts were careful not to grant this permission without
299
FAMILY TROUBLES
a thorough investigation. A deserted wife, whose husband had been gone three years, was refused a license by the Ply- mouth court, and in 1674, the same court could see no reason for granting a divorce to another whose husband had not ap- peared for seven years, although in the latter case she was to consider herself no longer bound, but free to marry again if she pleased.
Fire was one of the most dreaded calamities of the seven- teenth century, and stringent laws were passed to protect the settlements, the gallows being the fate of an incendiary, man or woman. Carelessness, also, in this regard was punished to the fullest extent. In 1668, an Ipswich maid was fined the enormous sum of forty pounds, added to a severe whipping, for burning her master's house, although it was not done in- tentionally. She told her own story to the court. She had "put her tobacco pipe into the fire and dipped up a coal in it to light it"; then she went outside and climbed up on the oven to "see if there were any hogs in the corn." She "layd her right hand on the thatch roof to stay herself and with her left hand knocked out her pipe over her right arme upon the thatch on the eaves of the house." After that she went com- placently away to the fields, and presently the house was blaz- ing and consumed.
Women of the early years had much need of courage. They lived in constant fear of an Indian attack - for the red men were always lurking around the outskirts, being especially troublesome after they had been introduced to the strongwater of the settlers. They knew the danger from the wild animals of the nearby forest. Women and children were daily sub- jected to apprehensions sufficiently alarming to tax the strength of the stoutest heart. Left alone in their houses, which were sometimes a mile apart, while the men folk of the families were at some distance in the fields, the timid ones often suffered acutely.
In 1667, the wives of the Salem farmers for these reasons rebelled against their husbands' obligatory watching in the town, which resulted in a petition being sent to the General Court to be relieved from this service. Some were obliged to go eleven miles, all within the territory of Salem, with arms and ammunition, which they declared was "more than a soldiers
300
WOMEN OF MASSACHUSETTS
march that is under pay." Sometimes nearly every man in that section of the town was on the watch, which depleted the whole neighborhood of men. "Newes that we are to watch," they complained, "strikes like darts to ye Hearts of some of our Wines that are weake," as they recalled what the Indians had done to some of their friends.
FAMILY AFFECTION
Notwithstanding the numerous marital grievances that the old records reveal, we must still believe that normal family life, happy, congenial and of good report, was rather the rule than the exception. Perhaps no better example of what con- stituted the true home-life of the seventeenth century, with its intensely religious atmosphere, can be given than in quoting from a letter written in 1681, by a wife and mother, who, hav- ing a premonition of death, left these loving instructions to her family :
"Be sure to carry well to your father, obey him, love him, follow his instructions and example, be ruled by him, take his advise and have a care of grieving. him. . Your father hath been loving, kind, tender-hearted toward you all; and . laborious for you all, both for your temporal and spiritual good : You that are grown up, cannot but see how careful your father is when he cometh home from his work, to take the young ones up into his wearied arms, by his loving carriage and care toward those, you may behold as in a glass, his tender care and love to you every one as you grow up: I can safely say that his love was so to you all that I cannot say which is the child that he doth love best he hath reproved you often for your evils, laying before you the ill event that would happen to you, if you did not walk in God's ways. ... And if it please the Lord that you live to match yourselves, and to make your choice : be sure you chuse such as first do seek the kingdom of Heaven. A tender- hearted, affectionate and entire loving husband thou hast been to me several ways. In all my burthens thou hast willingly with me sympathized, and cheerfully thou hast helped me bear them. This twenty years experience of thy love to me in this kind, hath so stamped it upon my mind, that
301
COURTSHIP AND WEDDED LIFE
I do not think that there never was man more truly kind to a woman."
COURTSHIP AND WEDDED LIFE
Marriages in the new world were early and frequent. As soon as girls reached a marriageable age, they were sought by farmers' and artisans' sons, who were often given a portion of the paternal estate upon which to build a house. Intermar- riages among families of clergymen and other professions, as well as among artisans, was a feature of this century. Single women or spinsters were not numerous, because if by chance a girl had passed her twenties without opportunity of mar- riage, she was quite likely to be appropriated sooner or later by some stricken husband, who, bereft of wife, was fortunate to get her to care for his motherless children. Spinsters were at first granted lots of land; but fearing that it would be a bad precedent to allow unmarried women to keep house alone, Governor Endecott put an end to this practice, by declaring that "granting lotts unto single maidens not disposed of in marriage" was a great evil. One woman in Salem thus re- fused, "being a maid," was consoled by a gift of four bushels of corn from the chief men of the town. On the other hand, bachelors were allowed home lots as an encouragement for marriage.
Families were large, life was hard and many mothers suc- cumbed before their children were grown. Second marriages were speedy, especially in the case of women, who, left with young children and little means, were forced to marry again as soon as possible. There are many cases of a woman's sec- ond marriage before sufficient time had elapsed to administer upon her deceased husband's estate. There is a tradition that a son of the Rev. Stephen Bachiler of Lynn and Hampton, left a widower with nine children, and with no especial predilec- tion as to where to turn for a mother to his large flock, re- solved to be governed in his choice by the direction in which his staff, held perpendicularly over the floor, should fall when dropped from his hand. It fell pointing toward the southwest and in that direction he bent his steps straight forty miles or more to the widow Mary Wyman of Woburn, a cousin of his wife. She discouraged his hopes on account of his large
302
WOMEN OF MASSACHUSETTS
family, and he made answer that it was the first time he had ever known of a woman to object to a proposal of this sort be- cause of the children; that he was going to Boston and would call for a definite answer upon his return. The widow's fears were overcome, and she became his wife.
In a will of 1642, a Rowley man very generously bequeathed to his then wife "one of my former wives gownes and two of the best petticotes," which gives an illuminating conception of the property rights of women of the seventeenth century. Wives were on the whole wonderfully well protected other- wise by the early laws, as the records of punishment for varied and flagrant abuse of women are shown repeatedly in the court papers. No man could ill-treat his wife with impunity ; neither was a petulant wife suffered long to "revile her husband."
Marriage contracts were often required when either per- son concerned was possessed of property, and in the ordinary family parents were eager to make suitable selections for their children. Nor was this mercenary bargaining in matrimonial ventures confined to the upright and pious Puritan magistrate and merchant of Salem and Boston. A spirit of calculation pervaded fashionable courtship, which did not disdain dis- cussing openly the bride's portion and deciding upon the mar- riage settlement. A case in Salem, in 1672, well illustrates the method of procedure as recorded in that court. Philip Cromwell informed Madam Corwin, wife of the leading mer- chant, that he wished his son John to marry Hannah, the daughter of Jacob Barney. Upon Barney being told of this affair, he went to the father of the young man, who invited him into the house and they then and there declared their willingness that the marriage should be consummated. When they began to discuss their "comfortable living," Mr. Crom- well, "having a cold in the head" could not hear what was . said, so Mrs. Cromwell conducted the conversation, "and they all agreed very lovingly," she suggesting "if they did marry, they should liue with them, if they would and take their diett with them. If they did not like to liue with ym they should liue in one end of their house and ymselues at the other end of it, yf they did not like to liue soe, they should goe into the other house and there I will furnish them two
303
MARRIAGE
rooms, withall necessaries; as for theire ordinarye occasions they shall not need to borrow anything."
MARRIAGE
Wedding ceremonies among the wealthy usually included a psalm before and a prayer following, with perhaps a sermon preached by the minister of the church which they attended, after which sackposset or some other drink was freely dis- pensed, while bride's cake and bride's gloves were later sent as gifts to the friends of the two families.
Governor Winthrop tells of a "great marriage" that was solemnized at Boston in 1647, which caused quite a stir in the colony. The bridegroom, who was of Hingham, had invited his pastor there to go to Boston and officiate at the wedding ; but the Massachusetts magistrates, hearing of the plan, had no intention of allowing the Plymouth colony minister to at- tend for that purpose and ordered him "to forbear." Winthrop says there was a cogent reason, that he was a man opposed to "our ecclesiastic and civil government, a bold man who would speak his mind, and we were not willing to bring in the English custom of ministers performing the solemnity of marriage." It is a question whether the objection was di- rected more to the man or the custom.
Sometimes a little persuasion was necessary to bring the suitor to the point of marriage, and one father frankly told his prospective son-in-law that if the latter had more love for his own estate than for the girl, he should not enter their house again. In two days they were married. The law as applied to servants and apprentices was very strict, and no one in these positions could contract a marriage without the consent of his master or mistress.
However much there may have been of matrimonial un- happiness, we like to think that for the most part peace and concord reigned in the majority of seventeenth century homes, and that there were many women in the new land who could echo the words of Anne Bradstreet, when she wrote :
If ever two were one, then surely we;
If ever man were loved by wife, then thee;
304
WOMEN OF MASSACHUSETTS
If ever wife was happy in a man, Compare with me, ye women, if you can. I prize thy love more than whole mines of gold, Or all the riches that the East doth hold.
My love is such that rivers cannot quench, Nor ought but love from thee give recompense.
Thy love is such I can no way repay,
The heavens reward thee manifold, I pray.
CHILDREN AND CHILD LIFE
The dreariness of the early period, so depressing to the parents, must have been reflected in the lives of young chil- dren. Those of the Plymouth immigration we know had a bitter struggle for existence. During the first winter, when the dead lay in nearly every habitation, we may well imagine scenes that made the stoutest hearts quail, as the cold took its toll, with a fearful mortality even among the strongest. How- ever, we can well believe also that, possessed of happy and joyous natures with which children have been endowed since the world began, they were able to throw off some of the surrounding gloom, and in their play forget the troubles of the grown-ups.
Childhood, even in desolate Massachusetts of this period, is inconceivable as separated from play, toys and games. Inven- tories of the early settlers, to which we are so much indebted for first-hand knowledge of their life in its many phases, leave us ignorant of any sort of toys. We know that the Pilgrim and Puritan children were rocked in wicker and wooden cradles and we cannot believe that they did not have rattles and infant toys, perhaps homemade, perhaps brought from England.
The cost of toys in England was enormous, for luxury was affecting all articles of domestic use. Silver toys among the wealthy were the fashion, but it is doubtful if many found their way to the little boys and girls of Plymouth, Boston or Salem. There were dolls, no doubt, for the maternal instinct in girls throughout the ages has been perpetuated in playing with dolls, just as the boys naturally turned to horses, whips and guns. It was not until the very end of the century that
305
SCHOOLS
a suggestion of the importation of toys has been found, Mr. Higginson writing to his brother in England that he thought toys would sell in the colonies if sent over in small quantities.
Whatever playthings colonial children possessed were of home manufacture in which the pocket knife played an im- portant part. No doubt all children had fewer toys and played more games, for games have survived by word of mouth through generations. Sling shots, whistles, balls, boats, games of soldiers, articles contrived from birch bark, gave employ- ment to the boys; while making cat's cradles, dolls, the fun to be derived from the wild flowers of the fields, such as split- ting dandelion stems, making daisy chains, weaving garlands of oak leaves, whistling through blades of grass, and many another trick with the leaves and flowers, gave ample oppor- tunity for play among the girls.
A sixteenth century engraving gives us a colorful and ac- curate picture of English child life with which the earliest settlers must have been familiar. It shows an elaborate war game going on, with both boys and girls as contestants; the game of blindman's buff; girls playing with household toys, such as pokers, tongs, spoons, covers, pails and mugs, and of course dolls. Boys were flying kites, playing hoop, walking on stilts, blowing bladders, jumping rope, playing leap-frog and the game of cup and ball.
Allotments of land were often made according to the num- ber in the family, and so in large families every child was an extra producer and an asset to be counted. In dress, chil- dren were diminutive counterparts of their parents, home- spun being worn by those in ordinary circumstances, and more elegant fabrics among the wealthy.
SCHOOLS
One of the first considerations was for the education of children, and all towns early established schools. As soon as they knew their letters, boys and girls were sent to a dame or a master, where they at least learned to read and write; by the middle of the century Latin schools had been established in all the largest towns where the study of Latin and Greek, for boys only, served as a preparation for college. So im-
306
WOMEN OF MASSACHUSETTS
portant was learning considered that, in 1673, those who were neglecting their duty in this regard, not bringing up their children to "som honest Caling and taught to Read as the Law directs," were to have their children taken away and given into the charge of those who would comply with the law. To this end, committees were appointed to go through the various towns and check up all the children, who were set to con more diligently their hornbooks and primers.
A sidelight showing how children of the average family re- ceived their training is to be found in an account of William Cogswell of Ipswich, who had charge of the education of the orphan children of his brother in 1676. He wrote: "We kept a schoole dame in my fathers house: to teach my brother Cogswells children and some other children we kept here at our own cost : and we indeverd to teach there chil- dren in reading and instructing of them in the fear of god and in september 1659 my mother came and lived in howse with me in my family and made it her imployment to teach the children in nouember my father and the rest of his family came and liued in the house with me and the rest of thayre imployment was to teach the children. John could read a chapter in the Bible very well and also in 1663 I had a man liued with me which I gave 12 li a yeare unto; that he could wright and reade very well and I aded to his wages 8 or 10s to perphect my cousen John in his writing and spelling and of sarving his stops in reading."
There were defective children in 1682, for another father testified to the hopelessness of teaching his son, who was "put to the great scooldame, Goodwife Collens," accounted preemi- nent in that "facaltie for Teaching Children" having been a teacher for thirty years, but he could not learn his letters after four years of exertion; then he was given into the hands of Mr. Andrews, who they thought "would learne him if he were capable to Learne of any bodie," but after four more years he had not learned "any sense though to know some of his letters which soon after he forgott," after all of which the honest teacher said he was ashamed to accept any remunera- tion for his trouble.
307
CHILD OFFENSES
CHILD RELIGION
Though Puritanism in its narrowness denied freedom to childhood and by its teachings incited fear in the mind of youth, the devotion that parents exercised in the training of their families along religious lines gave strength to the colo- nies from the beginning. Anne Bradstreet gave us a glimpse of a truly Puritan household when she wrote that at the age of six or seven she began to "make conscience of my wayes" and what she knew was sinful, such as lying and disobedience to parents, she avoided, but if she were "overtaken" with these evils she "could not be at rest 'till by prayer I had confest it unto God." The moral and spiritual welfare of the children of these households were punctiliously guarded both by the church and court. The progress of their children in the growth of grace lay close to the heart of the Pilgrim also, as the constant query, "Do your children and family grow more godly?" was put to them by those in authority.
Children were brought to baptism when but a few hours old, sponsored by a parent who was a church member or fre- quently by a grandparent, when neither parent had owned the covenant. Fear and dread of the life beyond for those who transgressed the law were instilled into the minds of children by the ministers from the beginning. There was nothing cheerful for them to contemplate in the ecclesiastical temper of the times. Prodigies there were in those days, for we learn of children of four years of age becoming converted, some able to read Bible stories before the age of two years, while others before the age of four could say the greater part of the Assembly Catechism, many of the Psalms, read distinctly and discuss what they read intelligently.
CHILD OFFENCES
The court threw its protecting arm about child life contin- ually. For neglect of children, such as leaving them alone in a house far from neighbors, the offender was subject to a sub- stantial fine. Boy and girl apprentices were not allowed to be abused or imposed upon. Children were "bound out," in many instances very young; we find a record of a Marblehead
308
WOMEN OF MASSACHUSETTS
widow's son three months of age being apprenticed to a tailor until he should reach the age of twenty-one. Presentments for slander, scandal-mongering and other misdemeanors so common among the adult population, could not have failed to bring to the attention of the children who witnessed these events or heard them discussed, a true sense of the enormity of the crimes and a wholesome regard for the proprieties of life.
Need help finding more records? Try our genealogical records directory which has more than 1 million sources to help you more easily locate the available records.