USA > Ohio > Hamilton County > Cincinnati > The old court house : reminiscences and anecdotes of the courts and bar of Cincinnati > Part 11
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In the days long agone, when Tom was quite a young man and flourished then as best he could with the girls-for perhaps he then had thoughts and hopes of matrimony -he resolved upon one occasion to have a good time with them. Tom's father's family, including himself, lived upon Sixth street, in this city, opposite the mansion house of the Spencers, and two of the Spencers -Oliver and Henry-were boon companions of Tom, and entered with him into all his projects for fun and frolic. It was winter time and the snow was on the ground, and the merry sleighs were jingling through the streets, mak- ing the "beautiful snow" still more beautiful; and Thomas, seeing the joyous girls and their beaux in the jingling sleighs, bethought himself of his girls, and what a good time he and his companions, the Spencer boys, might have with the girls, if they could only get a sleigh. To buy a sleigh was entirely out of the question ; to hire one, at the exceedingly high prices prevailing, was more than the pockets of the young men could stand in those days; and at last Tom bethought himself, that he and the Spencers could build a sleigh for themselves, and own it, and do what they pleased with it. Getting the tools, lumber, and material as best they could, at work
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the young sprigs of the law went, and labored and labored from day to day, for weeks and more, turning themselves into carpenters instead of law students, and at last the great big sleigh, sufficient to accommodate at least six inmates, the three young men and a girl apiece for each of them, was finally finished and ready for the snow. It was in good and graceful form and shape, and the sprigs getting red, white and green paint, and turning themselves from carpenters into painters, made it as pretty as a pink in color and adornment of filigree and stripes and things. All this work was done, all this car- pentering, and all this painting was executed, and the big sleigh was regularly built in the capacious CELLAR under the whole large and commodious house of Judge Hender- son, on Sixth street, opposite the Spencer mansion. And now the great love's labor job completely finished, there was more delightful fall of snow on the streets, and the boys properly and gladsomely bethought themselves of the girls, and each one of them went to each girl-his own girl-and invited them to a splendid sleigh-ride through the streets of the city, and over the hills and far away. The day and time of sleigh ride duly arrived, and, the father of the Spencer boys owing good ones, the horses were procured, and made ready with harness and belts of great large brass sleigh bells around their bellies, and brought to the house of Tom's father, that is, in the street, just before the front door of the house. But where was the magnificent sleigh? Time was flying, and the girls were waiting at their domiciles for the boys and the horses and the sleigh. The sprigs of the law went into the cellar and looked at, and again admired their handiwork, the capacious, and magnificient, and beautifully painted and filigreed sleigh ; and now to get
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it out of its place, where it was built, into the open air ; now to get it out of the cellar into the street, and the great question necessarily obtruded itself-How? There was but one exit from the cellar to the street, that was through the narrow outer cellar door, a world too narrow for the extended and expanded sleigh, and all the lifting and carrying of the splendid sleigh the boys could accomplish, would not get this great big sleigh through that limited cellar-way and door. The youngsters were surprised, astounded ! they were confounded, they were bedizzened, bewildered, and their horses and their girls were waiting, waiting, waiting. They took hold, all of them took hold, and lifted and carried the sleigh to the narrow exit of the cellar-way and door; they then sur- veyed both the big sleigh and the little cellar-door ; then they tried to put the tongue of the sleigh into and through the narrow way, and this they could accomplish, and did accomplish ; but for putting anything further of that capacious sleigh into or through that cellar way and door, the thing was literally just impossible, that was all ; and the large, commodious, painted, finished sleigh having no possible means of getting out, had, by the laws of nature and the rules of arithmetic, to stay in, and so at last-at last, the lawyers were forced reluctantly and lamentingly to conclude, and dolorous Tom was the first to speak and break the fruitless, though laborious silence. He said, meekly-very :
"Fellows, this, after all, is a d-d bad job, and we will have to give it up ; won't we !"
First Spencer-" Yes, Tom, we will have to give it
up. But what will the girls think and say?"
Tom-"Oh, we will go to them and tell them we couldn't get a sleigh in the whole town for love or money."
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Second S .- " That won't do ; for I told my girl that we were building a sleigh in your cellar, and it was all completed and finished and ready for a drive, and every- thing was ready, and she must be ready."
· First S .- "And I told my girl that, too, or words to that effect."
Tom-" You did not tell them about the cellar-door, did you?"
First S .- "No, I never thought of that-never !"
Tom-"Nor I neither ; d-n the cellar-door ! Why did we not build our sleigh on the high ground! What short-sighted fools we are! We might have known that we could never get a sleigh like that through that cellar- door ; d-n the thing !"
And so they all concluded, and duly donated the cellar-door to the deepest damnation for awhile, and then they got out of the narrow and limited cellar-way, them- selves, into the snowy, open air, and looking at the stand- ing, caparisoned horses, renewed their curses for awhile, and then took the horses and harness, home again, still keeping up their curses ever and anon ; and then they sep- arated, and each one went to the home of each girl, for they did not forget them, by any manner of means, thinking if they did, it would be all day with them, and all night, perhaps, and told a cock and bull story of how all the horses of every kind, (if not all the sleighs) in the town were hired and taken up, and they couldn't get any horse or horses for love or money, as solemnly agreed upon among them before they dolefully separated.
Of course, to the girls of Tom, and the Spencer boys, the tale was too thin, and soon the fact of the big sleigh built in the cellar by Tom and the Spencers, which, after being built, could not be got out of the cellar-
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door, was bruited about all over town, and the young shoots of the law were made the laughing butts of all the society women and men, and of course the story circulated at once among the legal fraternity, and from that day to the departure from this life of Henderson, when " poor Tom's a-cold," stuck to him, as the distin- guished lawyer, who once built a sleigh in the cellar, to take a sleigh-ride with the girls, and couldn't get it out of his cellar-door.
TOM HENDERSON, AND THE WITNESS WHO SLEIGHED HIM.
Tom was once examining a witness in Court-cross- examining the witness in an important case of his, in days of yore-and by his method and manner of ques- tioning, had vexed the witness a great deal, so that he would occasionally sharply answer back at the lawyer.
In the course of the case and the examination of witnesses, it became important to know the exact dimen- sions of the body of a cart, which was in controversy among other personal property, and Tom was engaged in cross-examining the witness on the aforesaid dimen- sions of the aforesaid cart.
Tom-" How big was the cart did you say witness?"
Witness-"Well, of the ordinary size ; about as big as other carts."
Tom-" But that won't do for an answer, Mr. Witness. I want you to be more particular in your testimony."
Witness-" I can't be more particular."
Tom-" Well, sir, you must be more particular."
Witness-"Well if I must be more particular, J should say, the cart in question was in its dimensions about the size of that sleigh you built in the cellar, and couldn't get out of the cellar-door."
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This was like a clap of thunder on Tom, but the occasion of the largest guffaw in the court room; and the lawyer wisely concluded to ask the witness no more questions, and to cross him no more by his cross-examin- ation.
TOM HENDERSON AND HIS PICTURE.
We have spoken of eccentric and curious Tom Henderson, sometimes in older days called the "real estate lawyer," because of the existence of so much that was of the earth, earthy, about his person, and generally liked very well, because of his harmlessness and innocu- ousness. Well, Tom was given to chewing tobacco-
" Filthy tobacco, that stinking weed, Which from the devil did proceed. Smoke and chew, and burn your clothes, And make a chimney of your nose."
And as a result of this he was also given to much spurting of tobacco juice. He chewed so much, and spit so much, that he always called the notice of others to his habit. Once upon a time, some joking artist lawyer drew a pencil sketch of "Tom," squirting his tobacco-juice, upon the rotund face of the big pillar in the court room, which helped to support the ceiling of the great, large room. The likeness of the picture was so clever, that every lawyer recognized the picture, and it, of course, afforded grounds for many a joke, and good and bad sayings of and about Tom. A lawyer one day said to Tom :
"Tom, have you seen your excellent portrait?"
"No," said Tom, "what portrait?"
Lawyer-"Your portrait on the pillar of the court room."
Tom-" My portrait on a pillow?"
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Lawyer-" No ; your picture on one of the columns of the court room."
Tom-" Where? let's go and see it."
No sooner said than done, and Tom looked at the picture, and evidently recognized it as pretty good, but he at last said, in a serious way :
" Whoever drew that unartistic caricature isn't smart. He may think he is, but I will bet a chew of tobacco that he knows no more about law than he does about making likenesses. It must have been some envious lawyer whom I have beaten in court, and if he don't look out, I'll beat him out of court."
One day, just before the opening of the court, some one was seen rubbing out that likeness on the pillar, and it was vexed Tom himself, and he rubbed it out, and did not, to any one's knowledge, rub or drub out the artist lawyer, although he found out long before, who it was, and it happened to be a lawyer who had recently beaten him in court, and had been considerably annoyed by Tom's spitting and squirting his tobacco juice about and around during the trial of the cause.
LAWYER JAMES BOYLE AND THE COURT.
A peculiar and singular man and lawyer was old James Boyle. He had been practicing law in the courts of justices of the peace and the criminal department of the old Court of Common Pleas-his clients generally being low and impecunious fellows, from whom James got, for fees, whatever he could, from a tooth-pick to a tin kettle, or brass watch. One day he had rather an important criminal case to attend to for the defense, in the Court of Common Pleas, and the prosecuting attorney wanted the case set down for trial at an early day, for
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he expected that the witnesses both for the State and the defense, would be tampered with, and he had not much confidence in the scrupulousness or unscrupulousness of James Boyle, the lawyer, about the matter. The court, agreeably to the request and application of the prosecu- ting attorney -- Boyle in opposition-said : " Mr. Boyle, we will set this case down for trial on to-morrow."
Boyle-" I oppose that. I will not have time to pre- pare my witnesses,"
Court-" Mr. Boyle, we don't mean to give you time to prepare your witnesses. We so order."
And the case was so set down.
A PRISONER'S REMARKABLE ESCAPE FROM THE PRISONER'S BOX, WHILE ON TRIAL. THE
PROSECUTING ATTORNEY, AND LAWYER STORER AND THE COURT.
There was a famous or infamous criminal, who most adroitly, cunningly and boldly made his escape from the hands of the law-even while he was being tried before the court, the jury, the sheriff, the clerk, the lawyers and the audience, in the old court house. This was Simeon Ullery, once known throughout all the land for his forg- ing and counterfeiting the bank notes of the many and various local banks of the country. Charles H. Brough was the prosecuting attorney, and Bellamy Storer, I think, was Ullery's attorney and advocate; the court consisted of Presiding Judge William B. Caldwell, and associates, Morse, Wiseman and Moore. Simeon Ullery was being tried for forging and counterfeiting a bank note, and was likely to be convicted, and this nobody knew so well as himself, notwithstanding the efforts of
11
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his distinguished counsel in his behalf. The prisoner was sitting in the elevated, balustraded, long-benched and big prisoner's box, existing in the old court house, which I have once described. The trial proceeded, and the evidence was closed, and the prosecuting attorney had made his argument, and the able advocate for the prisoner was becoming more and more eloquent, and in a blast of exceeding eloquence riveted the attention of the court, the jury, all the officials and the auditory upon himself- the orator. Ullery, in the deep attention of all to the eloquence of the orator, saw at once his opportunity, and, like Napoleon Bonaparte, he knew that an opportunity lost was a misfortune forever, and he deliberately got out of the prisoner's box, outside of the bar, thence out of the court room, and thence out of the court house and thence along Eighth street out of its vicinity, and thence over the hills and far away, and thence to the river, and thence into a skiff which he stole for his purpose, and thence across the Ohio River, and thence into the woods of Kentucky, and thence to parts so unknown, that he personally has never been seen or heard of, since. The orator was through with his eloquence, and his argument for the defendant, and the prosecuting attorney had begun his speech in reply, and was about to refer to the prisoner in the box, and turned around to look at the prisoner in the box ; but now to his surprise, and the surprise of sheriff, court, jury, his lawyer, all the lawyers, everybody in the court room, there was no Simeon Ullery there. The bird had flown, the cage was empty. A hue and cry was immediately raised ; the sheriff and his posse of deputies, and a huge posse comitatus, darted out of the court house, and not mistaking the desirable and attractive path pursued by the prisoner, they pursued it, over the hills and far away ;
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but not the prisoner, for he was already in the woods of Kentucky, and his lone bark was on old Kentucky's shore, left without oarsman or occupant. After the the astonishment at the bold act, of all concerned in the court room, the prosecuting attorney remarked, that in the emergency he would take the advice of the court as to whether he should proceed in the case of the State of Ohio versus Simeon Ullery, just now on trial.
The counsel for the prisoner, getting over his own amazement at the bold and cunning adventure and escape of his client, before the eyes of all, although all those eyes had at the time evidently been diverted from the prisoner to his lawyer, arose in his place and objected to proceeding with the trial on the ground that the prisoner was not present, "and it was the right and privilege of the accused, by the terms of the constitution of the United States, and the constitution of the State of Ohio, the very fundamental organic law of the land" (and here he read from both constitutions), "to be present face to face with his accusers, and to confront the witnesses face to face ; this was the guaranteed constitutional right of the prisoner, and who could deprive him of it; who in this land would dare deprive a person of so sacred a right. It was then clearly unconstitutional to proceed with the case ; the prisoner was not here, and the case must fall and fail."
The presiding judge for a moment or two consulted sotto voce with his associates on the bench, and then declared the unanimous opinion and will of the court : " This cause of the State of Ohio against Simeon Ullery now on trial, will go on in due and proper progress. Mr. Prosecuting Attorney, you can proceed with your argu- ment before the jury. It is undoubtedly the constitutional
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right and privilege of the accused prisoner to be present at his trial, and meet the accusers and the witnesses face to face ; but it is a right and a privilege ; and the prisoner can, if he chooses so to do, waive his right and privilege, and it is a well settled principle of law, as well as of com- mon sense, that the prisoner, or his counsel for him, can not take advantage of his own wrong. The trial was pro- ceeding, and the prisoner chose himself to flee and escape from the very temple of justice itself, and therein commit a gross wrong. He can not take advantage of this. The trial must go on. Proceed, Mister Prosecuting Attorney."
And he did proceed, and the court charged the jury, and the jury retired to consult over their verdict, and soon returned into court and pronounced " Simeon Ullery guilty in manner and form as charged in the indictment." But Simeon has never been sentenced on this conviction. It stands now against him on the records of the old Court of Common Pleas, but the aforesaid Simeon is not, and has not been found, and never will be, unless, prehaps, we go away below to find him. This is a curious and remarkable incident. I don't know its parallel for cun- ning shrewdness, alertness and seizing just the proper moment of time, taking just the minute, the second of opportunity. Suppose such ability had been used in honesty and honor, instead of dishonesty and dishonor !
LAWYER JOHN C. WRIGHT AND THE BOSTONIAN.
Judge John C. Wright, the successor of Mr. Ham- mond, in the editorial chair of the Cincinnati Gazette, was an able lawyer, an able judge, an able member of Congress, and an able editor. Mr. Hammond requested on his death bed the publishers of the Gazette, to make
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Judge Wright his successor. So Colonel Crafts J. Wright, the judge's son, now living in Chicago, informs me. Judge Wright came to this city after he had been judge of the Ohio Supreme Court, about the year 1834, I think. His son, Crafts J., had been practicing law in partnership with Mr. Hammond before him. He went into partnership with Timothy Walker, of much repute as a lawyer, a scholar, and a gentleman, and the firm became Wright & Walker, and did a big business, as I had full occasion and opportunity to know, being a student and clerk in their office for over three years, and afterward connected with them in a measure. Judge Wright was the author of "Wright's Supreme Court Reports," a law book of much legal authority in former days, and of great use yet. The cases reported by Judge Wright are of much varied interest, and authority, on many legal questions, and frequently are reported in a vein of peculiar facetiousness, for which the judge-little man in stature that he was, was peculiarly distinguished. The judge was in conversation one day with a Yankee gentleman, recently from the hub of the universe :
Boston-"So I see, Judge Wright, you have a Massachusetts gentleman for your partner."
Fudge-"Yes. He is a Boston Walker, and a good talker."
Boston-" So I've heard ; quite a scholar too?"
Fudge-" The best in the world ; a walking ency- clopædia- a complete Walker in that respect.
Boston-" Ah-I am told he is rich, very wealthy?"
Fudge-" Yes. He has walked himself into some- thing in that way."
Boston-"Just like all intelligent and learned Bos- tonians who immigrate to the West. They all get rich.
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I suppose Mr. Walker made his wealth by the practice of
1 the law?"
Fudge-"No, not by a great deal. Lawyers don't make money by the practice of the law. My friend, Mr. Walker, made his by investing in matter o' money with a lady."
Boston-"Aha ! Yes, yes. Aha!" [Exit Boston.]
JUDGE WRIGHT, TIPPECANOE'S CONSCIENCE KEEPER.
In the days of the " Tippecanoe and Tyler too " po- litical campaign, Judge Wright used to be called by the adversary political press, one of General Harrison's con- science keepers. This arose from the fact that he be- longed to a committee of three, consisting of himself, Judge Burnet, and another whom I just now forget, who were appointed by political friends, to answer all the political letters addressed to the general, who, at the time, a weak, infirm, old man, was not thought fully able to attend to all the duties of the laborious campaign. As I know well, it did not at all disturb Judge Wright to be dubbed a conscience keeper of the General. "Better be a keeper of the good conscience of the General, than the hunter-up of the conscience of Martin Van Buren," he would sometimes facetiously say.
CONGRESSMAN JOHN C. WRIGHT AND CONGRESSMAN DAVY CROCKETT.
I must not forget to narrate a story, though somewhat at the expense of my old friend and law preceptor, Judge Wright. I know if he were alive he would not take it amiss, because he frequently told the story upon himself. Judge Wright was formerly a member of Congress from Ohio, from the Steubenville district, and while there he
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had for a fellow representative from the State of Tennes- see, the long ago famous Davy Crockett. Judge Wright was not at all attractive in personal appearance. He was a diminutive man in stature, with a very large head, and a prominent face of not very handsome features, so that his looks, by no means prepossessing, were perhaps quite plain and homely, and not at all strikingly beautiful or picturesque. His mouth, chin and nose were extended somewhat, and this fact did not add to his beauty. Indeed, he had a reputation for being a very able and ill-looking congressman. On one occasion, Davy Crockett was vis- iting a menagerie of animals-not the House of Repre- sentatives-in Washington city, and he had a friend with him. They were looking around at the animals, and at last they came to the place where the monkeys were. Among these was one large, grinning, full-faced monkey, and as Crockett looked at him, he observed to his friend, "why, that monkey looks just like our friend, Judge Wright from Ohio." At that moment he turned around, and who should be just behind him, admiring the same monkey, but Congressman Judge Wright, himself. “I. beg pardon, Judge Wright," said Crockett, "I beg par- don ; an apology is certainly due somewhere, but for the life of me, I cannot tell whether it is to you, or the monkey."
THE FIRM OF WRIGHT & WALKER, AND MONROE EDWARDS .- HOW THE FORMER WAS TAKEN, AND TAKEN IN, BY THE LATTER, ETC.
I remember an incident occurring when I was in Wright and Walker's office, that I must not forget to nar- rate. One day, a gentleman dressed in rich attire, with a large-rimmed, palmetto hat surmounting his brow, came into our office and asked for the lawyers of the firm.
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Accompanying the gay and solemn-looking gentleman, was an apparent close body-servant-a youthful mulatto, well dressed and much devoted to his or her master. The mulatto impressed me as being remarkably fine-featured and really beautiful in form and figure and face. The name the master called his servant by, if memory serves, was "Robert." Well, Judge Wright and Mr. Walker soon appeared, and the gentleman, learning their names, introduced himself by some name which I now forget, and announced himself from the South-from the great State of Mississippi-that his business with the firm was to have deeds of emancipation duly prepared for the release from slavery of about one hundred and forty slaves, who were now on his plantation in Mississippi, and whom he was now about to set free. Of course, lawyers were astonished at such benevolence and such munificence and such self-sacrifice in those anti-abolition times ; but they were gratefully prepared to do the great business so confidingly and so nobly and so compliment- arily intrusted to them, and, with all due preliminaries settled, at work the force of the office went, in the due preparation of deeds of emancipation for one hundred and forty negro slaves, "now on a certain plantation belonging to -, in - county, State of Mississippi." The fact, of course-such a wonder, such a miracle as it was deemed-got noised about, throughout the city, and the great and honored gentleman from the South, from the State of Mississippi, had many introductions to the best business men of the city -bankers chiefly on his own request-and all the deeds were made out, and the southern gentleman, with his body-servant, called for them at an appointed time at the office. They were duly delivered to him. He requested that they might be left
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